Witty or Witless? 

​Early to bed, early to rise, makes a poor man healthy and ANNOYING to those around him. 

What’s the difference between a deacon and a demon?  One’s ordained the others profane. Hopefully,  you can tell the difference. 

Digital books don’t smell right. 

Do cannibals ever go back to the same dentist for a cleaning? Do they eat where they treat? Just curious …

Do former Starbucks employees gravitate toward ministry as a new career? Theres a coffee shop in the church foyer and the new pastor says ‘Grande’ a lot.
What’s the difference between a headache and a migraine?  When it is someone else’s it is a headache. When it is yours it is a migraine.

I dropped my electric shaver on the bathroom floor at work and I was on my knees looking when the door opened. They assumed I am a Prayer Warrior.

Everyone is always talking about stereotypes.  I wonder in mono-types feel left out?

Everything sounds better with a cowbell. Jesus loves cowbell. More cowbell please.

Early to bed, early to rise, makes a poor man healthy and ANNOYING to those around him. 
Free speech will cost you.  Trust me on this,  I’m married.  

Wounds

I long for my childhood days when a kiss and a band-aid were enough to make my wounds better.  

Bloody your knees?  Here’s a band-aid. Paper cut? Here’s another band-aid. 

I’m personally fond of the ones decorated with Superman on them. 

Sometimes I left the bandage on to long and it became dirty.  Instead of promoting healing the  bandages fused to my skin and became infected. An infection untreated could lead to complications. In wartime an untreated infection could lead to amputation of a limb and possibly death.

So the bandage has to come off. Whoever called them ouchless lied or was delusional.  Sometimes in the process it removed part of the skin and scab also. 

The healing process had been delayed and had to start again. It was so hard to not mess with a wound that was on its second band-aid. 

As we get older we realize that not all wounds can be healed by a kiss and a band-aid.  And not all wounds are physical in nature.  

But our first response is still to cover the wound and hope for a quick healing. 

Unlike our physical wounds,  others can’t see the emotional bandaid or self protective mechanism we have put in place.  

But our friends know when they accidentally poke them.We hurt  and suddenly everyone knows. Even if we can’t articulate why. 

All we know is that we want that band-aid back on as soon as possible. 

I’ve done that emotionally for to many years. But true healing only happens when we remove the bandage and let it breathe. Covering it only makes the wound fester. 

Maybe its time to pull off the band-aid and seek healing.  

The Thought that Counts

Have you ever had that moment when the saying,  “The road to hell is paved with good intentions”, described you or someone who was trying to help you? 

The experience can make you doubt whether a poorly executed attempt at help can really count for any good. 

Well-intentioned people can sometimes make things worse.  Providing Vicks deep heating rub when someone asked for Vaseline petroleum jelly is not good. Especially when they are applying it to a sensitive body part. Good intentions would not lessen the discomfort felt by the recipient. 

But sometimes good intentions, although imperfectly performed, can be okay. I recently grabbed a lotion so I could give my wife a foot rub. Unfortunately,  I grabbed self tanning lotion instead of foot creme. I was able to complete the foot rub and we had a good laugh. In this case the thought did count. 

There are moments when good intentions, that were not executed properly, can still leave a positive impression. My wife planned a grand romantic gesture where when I opened the garage  I would be greeted with falling rose petals. It worked perfectly in her tests.  But nothing fell when i opened the garage.  To make matters worse,  when she tried it after I came in the petals flowed beautifully.  She was frustrated.  Had the flowers worked the first time I would have remembered it for a short season. Because it failed I will never forget what she intended to do.  In this case the thought did count and still does. 

Remember that not everyone will know your true intention, they only see the resulting action. 

I will leave you with two quotes to consider.  

“Plans are only good intentions unless they immediately degenerate into hard work.” PETE DRUCKER

“No one would remember the Good Samaritan if he’d only had good intentions; he had money.  MARGARET THATCHER 


3 Benefits of Pain and Discomfort

We spend a lot of effort avoiding pain and discomfort. We buy medications to numb ourselves. We avoid people who make us uncomfortable. We devote much of our resources buying things that make us feel comfortable.

But there are three benefits to pain and discomfort. 

1. It’s an early warning sign that we are about to do harm to ourselves or others. Touch something hot and we immediately let go. Otherwise we would hold it and burn ourselves. 

2. It can motivate us to consider changing our condition.  It may cause us to move away from harmful relationships. It may prompt us to pursue a job change. It may force us to seek medical attention for healing.

3. It is a sign that we are fully engaged in living. We were created with a need for relationships. Doing life with others can be painful. But it also can multiply our opportunities for joy. 

We need to listen to our pain and discomfort. What is it telling us?